Been feeling really out of sorts lately. Despite having lots of things to worry about, I can still slack around and relax, go out drinking and while away my time. Sometimes I try to make myself work, but my mind would draw a blank when I want to do something mentally intensive. Which is terrible because most of my work at present requires lots of thinking and analysis.

At least 2 persons have commented to me this week that I seem to be very relaxed for someone ‘with my kind of grades’ and amount of work to do. I reflected on that and I found it to be true. How then, do I manage to finish everything I have and yet have 8 hours of sleep a day, time to go out for wine, dinners and shopping in the evenings, and trawling the web at home on my free days?

Or have I been deluding myself by trying to escape from work and not think about all the things I need to do, and by doing things half-heartedly?

Or is it just that I have come to a stage where I am comfortable with doing things in an efficient, effective manner and thus can take things in my own stride?

Whatever the case is, I think I should really try to work harder. Whether it is because I am trying to escape from my troubles or even if I am really that efficient, I guess I should not while away time that I can spend on doing other more meaningful things.

Sigh. I think I’m losing control of my life’s steering wheel.

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