It's My Life

Exam results are out

This semester I expected to score significantly worse than previous ones, because I feel that I didn’t put in as much effort as before especially for the exams.

However, I was quite surprised when I saw the results of 3 As and 1 B+. Completely took me by surprise, especially when I was expecting a majority of B+s.

Actually knowing the good results didn’t make me feel any happier. It’s become kind of a standard expectation I have for myself, so when I get the results I just go, “Oh well, guess I’m OK”. I suppose its not a good thing at all, because this means once I get good grades, I have to consistently perform on the same level to satisfy my own and other people’s expectations of me. It puts a whole load of pressure on myself to perform well… and sometimes when the going gets tough (especially when doing projects with freeloaders) it gets so stressful that I often become grouchy and snap at people around me.

I’m glad that while I’m on exchange the next semester, the grades will all be on pass/fail basis. I hope this will allow me to take a good break away from the pressure of obtaining As. However I am at the same time worried that because I’m already used to working hard, I’ll still have the same high levels of expectation for myself and make my own life difficult when its not necessary to work too hard. But I’ll try to keep this in mind and remind myself to take it easy.

© 2007 this lush garden within.